It has been awhile since I have updated this blog. Not lack of good intention – mostly lack of clarity of the “truth” I want to share. It’s like the “What I Know For Sure….” statements that Oprah shares on her shows and in her magazines. Statements of profoundness and ‘a-ha’ moments, and those things you know, that you know, that you know.
My truth today has to do with letting go.
“Silence becomes cowardice when occasion demands speaking
out the whole truth and acting accordingly.”
― Mahatma Gandhi
When you have gone through years of experiencing feelings of unhealthiness, pain, discomfort, weakness, brain fog, depression – a truth you know to be true, because you’ve lived it, only to be written off by medical professionals essentially “it’s in your head”, it creates lack. Lack of confidence, lack of knowing or believing what is and isn’t true, lack of energy, lack of motivation to continue to search out more answers, lack of self-worth, self-love, and self-anything for that matter. Some days it’s just easier to live with the unhealthy truth that is familiar, rather than stepping into that place that will throw the entire system into a roaring cyclone of uncertainty, and discover new truths that will take its place.
I am here to say – bring on the cyclone. You cannot grow if you stay the same. You cannot learn if you don’t seek. Most of all, dare to be bold. Own your truth as you know it. You may feel alone because no
one else around you understands what you experience. I’m here to say, that’s okay. It’s not easy, but it’s okay. Because, even though you may feel alone, there are people out there who has experienced similar things, and there are people out there who can help you. You have to be be bold, daring, full of faith, and vulnerable to the possibility of what may seem like another failed attempt for answers or a label/diagnosis.
Let go of the idea of that need or desire for a label or diagnosis.
The need to be healthy is way more important then the need for a diagnosis.
I was having a conversation with a long-time friend of mine, several months ago, who has battled Lyme’s disease for the better part of 10 years. She reminded me the destination of this journey is not at the diagnosis or label – although, (trust me on this one) you feel there would be a ton of weight and stress lifted if you had one. The destination of this journey is not a destination at all. It is the journey itself.
It’s the choices we make in each moment of every day to be consistent in what we know today. Today I know I need to create the right conditions for my body help heal itself; feed my 
body highly nutritious food in the right amounts, drink as much water as I can, give my body the opportunity rid itself of toxins and stress through regular high-intensity exercise, and consistently provide my body with probiotic supplements, Omega-3’s, calcium and B & D vitamins. That, at the very least will provide an environment that will encourage health and healing.
To catch you up in my journey of B12 and Vitamin D deficiencies since 2010, I will be posting my experiences of the following as a continuation of my journey:
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2010 – Experiencing old things in new ways
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Fall of 2011: Getting my B12 levels checked after having recurring symptoms of B12 deficiency. The results – my levels almost as low as they were when I was first diagnosed
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January of 2012: Sought out a naturopathic doctor who “diagnosed” and put me on a cleanse for candida. (Which after learning this makes sense as to why I cannot keep my B12 levels at a higher level.)
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The effects of the lack I mentioned above; lack of discipline in being consistent with eating healthy food, exercise, water, supplements, lack of controlling stress and lack of
taking care of myself physically and emotionally -
Experiencing more symptoms of imbalance in my body: eczema and skin issues that won’t go away
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Learning the hard way I was overly toxic and cleansed too quickly and resulted in the toxins exiting my body through my skin – which also had a reoccurrence 9 months later
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January of 2014: Life changing work in personal development and self-confidence
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April of 2014: stepping out into a 3 week Oligoantigenic Diet – that “eliminates all foods that could potentially provoke an allergic response”, and “seeks to resolve inflammation in the gut”. With the goal to re-establish a healthy environment to which my body can properly absorb its nutrients and create a less acidic environment in general.
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I will also share some product lines that have above and beyond profoundly changed my life: particularly Rodan + Fields
I think I have addressed this in previous posts – but I do want to be very clear in stating – I do not have medical training, nor am I a doctor. All of what I write is based on my personal experience and research I have done. The intention for writing this blog is for the purpose of sharing my story is giving someone else encouragement and hope of finding resolve and health in their own lives.
As someone who has been in, around, down and through this struggle, it’s important to find clarity and know what your truth is today. Some days, you might not have any idea what is true, what isn’t true, who to believe, or even if you believe what you are experiencing is real.
Dare to be bold. Know your truth.
In the beginning of 2014 – I created a motto that I have lived by daily ever since. (see below). That’s all I can do.
The B12 Chronicles 